I'm sitting on a log, in bog, with a homensog. I'm eating a bagel, with a shmagel with a giggle. Suddenly, I spray AXE on myself and the world vibrates as if there's a hurricane. There are millions of women stampeding towards me lustfully. Then I have herpes, and my tonsils feel slightly tie-dyed. Then, I realize it is real and I'm actually on the computer